“Until we have seen someone’s darkness, we don’t really know who they are…. Until we have forgiven someone’s darkness, we don’t really know what love it.” -Marianne Williamson
Have you ever been there during someone’s darkest moments? What was it like? Did you stay by their side or did you leave while they were lost in their pain?
I know it’s hard to deal with someone during their darkest moment. Sometimes it’s easier to walk out of their life. You find yourself making excuses of why you shouldn’t remain in their life. We all have done it, at one point in our lives. We all have chosen to focus on the bad memories instead of the good ones.
Why not remember the good times? At one time you guys smiled and laughed together. Crazy memories were made, and they weren’t all bad. One time it was exactly what you wanted…
Now focus on that memory. Focus on the friendship you once had, before everything turned dark. It’s there, you just have to learn to focus on the good times. It’s all about perspective.
Life will throw you curve balls. There will be times in your life where you forget who you are. Things will happen that will ultimately change your inner self. The innocence you once had may disappear, and the light within you may burn out. It is your choice to pick yourself up and start over again.
I have had hardships, betrayals, made mistakes and experience loss. But through it all, I am grateful for my experiences. Learning to forgive, love, and most importantly accepting myself. I’m no longer constantly worried about how people view me, but I’m worried about how I view myself and becoming a better person. Who walks in love and forgiveness.
Sometimes we bleed on ppl who didn’t cut us because we haven’t healed from what hurt us. We blame others for our hurts. When in reality the choices we made were what caused our hurts. And sometimes by the time we see this, it’s already too late. We lost them forever. And nothing you do will ever change their mind. They define you by your darkest moment, and will never see otherwise. Again, it’s all about perspective….
No one forced me to act a certain way. It was no one’s fault, but my own. Knowing this fills me with so much hope. Yes, I lost people in my life that meant the world to me. But I realized that I don’t have to define myself through someone else’s eyes. I have the choice to not suffer. I can heal, allowing myself to mess up and feel pain with no judgment.
Perspective is key……
If I can forgive someone else for hurting me, Why can I not forgive myself? Or vise versa… If I can forgive myself for all the dumb mistakes I have made and for hurting the people I love. Then shouldn’t I be merciful and extend forgiveness to those who have hurt me? Shouldn’t I walk in compassion and understand that we all deserve to be loved in our dark moments. We all deserve to be remembered as our true self and not just who we are when we are hurting. We all hurt and we all have insecurities. We all make mistakes, so why not just forgive instead of holding resentment for each other in our hearts?
Again it is all about your perspective….
Even though I have scars from the past, I am thankful for the lessons I learned. Because every struggle in my past has shaped me into the person I am today. And with every bad memory, there is also a happy memory that I remember. A memory that once made me smile and laugh. And when the bad times past, the memory helped me to understand myself a little bit more. Our past is just a series of lessons, not a life sentence.
What do you choose?